Is Love Is Blind Just Rage Baiting Us at This Point?

Love is Blind has officially been on the air for 11 seasons. And with its latest season (Boston) premiering over the duration of October and November, it’s clear that one thing is true: The male options just keep getting worse and worse.I genuinely believe that when the first season aired, Nick and Vanessa Lachey (who I’m surprised still have their jobs) set out to test whether love was truly blind. We got iconic couples like Lauren and Cameron and saw what it was like for a group of ordinary people to seek love without defaulting to someone’s physical appearance.But, somewhere along the lines, I have to assume the actual mission behind the show became “rage bait the women of America.”While I now feel comfortable saying that it takes a certain type of person to go on a show like LIB, it’s clear that there’s a huge discrepancy in emotional, mental, and (let’s be real) physical standards that the female contestants must meet compared to their male counterparts. Translation: These reality TV dating shows are gathering mostly intelligent, confident, well-rounded and attractive women and sticking them in pods with men who look and act like they snuck onto Earth from a MAGA-infested alien planet. And I for one have had enough.I would preface this with a spoiler alert, but at this point, season 11 is no different than a majority of the past seasons of LIB: the men are manipulative, lacking emotional intelligence, and have looks that don’t even begin to excuse their awful personalities.Just a few of the offenses this season?Morrey is constantly trying to validate his masculinity through his status and appearance (when he really shouldn’t be). John expects emotional intimacy from women but then says comments like “she’s in my bottom two”—and doesn’t have the wherewithal to close the door so that Sarah doesn’t hear it. Stew thinks he’s the prize (ick) and even tells Jax after proposing to her that she’s a “lucky woman.” Wilson and John both didn’t bother getting down on one knee (is chivalry truly dead?). John had some very concerning views (and misinformation) about abortion—oh and he’s anti-vaxx. Rob likes to lead women on and is severely delusional about what he looks like (no, you do not look like Travis Kelce). Blake wants someone to shift their whole life to adjust to his lifestyle. And Cam doesn’t know how to have a serious moment without laughing in someone’s face.The reason that people go on the show is to escape the deficiencies of real life dating. If these women truly wanted such awful choices, they would’ve just swiped on dating apps in Boston.Of course, the women aren’t perfect. For example, Jax ghosts Stew after the engagement. And at the end of the day, despite the toxic masculinity we see in a majority of the contestants on this season, there are six couples that get engaged—which means despite the behavior of the men, six of the women said yes to a proposal.One could argue that LIB is merely a microcosm for the realities of dating today (a think piece for another day)—but I resent that. The reason that people go on the show—or at least what they should be going on the show for—is to escape the deficiencies of real life dating. If these women truly wanted such awful choices, they would’ve just swiped on dating apps in Boston. But by creating a show, LIB has a responsibility to both parties to give them the best possible pick of partners.The men repeatedly seem invested in demonstrating that they're funny, attractive, successful, confident, desirable, etc. The women are much more likely to have conversations about whether they feel safe, understood, respected, or compatible.And this is far from new for LIB. Season after season, the women tend to arrive at the altar—or walk away from it—having done far more of the uncomfortable emotional work: asking the hard questions, identifying incompatibilities, setting boundaries, and trying to understand what their partners actually need. The men, meanwhile, have repeatedly been allowed to frame emotional avoidance as being “confused,” arrogance as confidence, and indecision as taking their time.Think of Shake from season 2, fishing for information on Deepti’s weight and then comparing his attraction to her as if she were “his aunt.” Or season 6 when Jeramey lies about seeing a former connection the night before meeting Laura’s parents. Or season 7 when Tyler fails to mention to Ashley that he literally has children. Time and time again women who, yes, aren’t perfect, but for the most part are still trying to genuinely make connections and find a life partner, come into the pods to be met with men who are looking to do what they do outside of the pods: find someone they think is hot, project their insecurities onto them, and then leave them emotionally worse off than whatever drove them to go on LIB in the first place.Reality TV—especially when it’s a dating show—is meant to be messy and entertaining. It is TV after all. But if you’re going to create a show that’s rooted in taking the vanity and superficiality out of dating, at least try to make an effort to give women on the show the opportunity to meet someone that’s genuinely kind, caring, and maybe not a red-pilled maniac.If LIB is bent on having emotionally mature and open women come onto a show to be traumatized by a flock of rude, entitled, and emotionally unavailable men... well, at least let them see if they’re hot or not.