‘I chose the bigger world’: Musician Emma Louise reflects on men, music and heartbreak

November 1, 2026 — 5:00amMusician Emma Louise is best known for her 2011 song Jungle, which was inspired by a former love. Here, the 35-year-old explains the story behind the song, as well as discussing the other significant men in her life, including her son, Ellsworth.Emma Louise: “Something I’ve figured out over the past four years is to take life as it comes.”My maternal grandfather, Henry, was an engineer in the tablelands north of Cairns. He came from a big family and worked on trains and steam engines. He was a storyteller and a creative spirit who loved poetry and played the violin. He passed away when I was young.My paternal grandpa, Arthur [Ted], lived in Brisbane. He would get me and my cousin to sit on his lap while he’d sing Irish folk songs like Danny Boy. His breath smelt like whisky and cigarettes. He passed away when I was in my mid-20s.I’m a daddy’s girl – we have always been close. Dad [Greg] is very nurturing, funny and patient. He was a fireman and used to work night shifts. He would iron our clothes before school.My brother, Vince, is 15 months older than me. I have a memory of us on a swing set when I was four. My whole childhood with him was a blessing – lots of belly laughing. We developed our sense of humour together. He is very sensitive and knew early on it was OK for a boy to have feelings.My first kiss was with a boy called Neil in grade 1 or 2. We’d write notes to each other, and one day we agreed to meet behind the toilets after school. He came around the corner and at me so fast it was like a kiss-and-headbutt situation; it was terrifying and I felt butterflies.I was obsessed with Missy Higgins, Pete Murray, Ben Lee, and especially Josh Pyke – I was a big fan and got to support him in Cairns when I was still a teenager. Josh responded to my music and always respected me.I met veteran musician Terry Doyle in Cairns when I was playing gigs three times a week. He took me under his wing, taught me how to set up my own PA, how to talk to a crowd and how to roll up leads – all that functional stuff that comes with gigs.My first manager, Rick Chazan, nurtured me as an artist. He invested in me in the hope I’d becomesuccessful. At that stage, my experience with men in the music industry was very positive. It was only when I moved out of home at 17, moved to the USA and lived in LA that gender came into play.I didn’t fall in love until I was 19. It felt like there was nothing in between me and Tom; then we became one and it was magic. He is such a beautiful person and that experience was special to me. We dated until I was 23, when my career started to take off. I was being pulled between exploring this bigger world and being in a relationship. Ultimately, I chose the bigger world. But I do think this soft starting place with Tom acted as a bit of a placeholder for me. He inspired the song Jungle.I was single for a long time after Tom. I dated a guy called James – he was fun and we travelled the world for a year.I met my ex-husband, Tobias [Jesso], through music. We started talking on Instagram and I sent him some of my songs. He produced my 2018 album, Lilac Everything. We got married at my property in Australia in 2019 and had a child in 2020. I think if you love someone and want to celebrate it, that’s great. Marriage creates stability in a way, and it’s difficult when you get divorced.I was diagnosed with ADHD 10 years ago, and autism after that. Both were a surprise. I went to a psychiatrist for the first time when I was in America. Then I started taking medication and my life changed.Something I’ve figured out over the past four years is to take life as it comes. I am very happy being by myself; I don’t get lonely. But my soul is always curious about romance.My son, Ellsworth, is the best thing that’s ever happened to me. He’s opened my eyes to this world in a completely different way. He is named after the American painter and sculptor Ellsworth Kelly.Sunshine for Happiness by Emma Louise is out now.Get the best of Sunday Life magazine delivered to your inbox every Sunday morning. Sign up for our newsletter.From our partners