50 Funny Puns That Are So Corny They're Clever

Bad joke, dad joke; funny, punny; tomato, tomahto: it's all a matter of perspective—and wordplay. Sure, they might teeter on corny or cliché, but the beauty of puns is that they lettuce appreciate the sillier side of language. Whether it's a food joke that's a little too cheesy or a niche punchline that takes a second to ferment, puns have a way of growing on you. Just let this collection of clever—sometimes cringy, and always cackle-worthy—ones do the talking (or at the very least, stop the honorary dad jokester of the group from doing so).Case in point: how can you spot a nosy pepper? It gets jalapeño business! Or why don't chemists like puns? Because all the best ones argon. Speaking of, never trust an atom; they make up everything.If those puns were your cup of tea, this list is brewing with more! Use them to break the ice in an otherwise chilly Monday morning email chain, ragebait the grammar police of your group chat, or just about any time you need to remind the room that it’s okay to be unserious.Ready to have some pun? Here are 50 funny puns that are so bad they're brilliant.Best Funny PunsPaulinaKon/GettyImages1. People who don't know the difference between entomology and etymology bug me in ways I cannot put into words.2. I once entered 10 puns in a joke contest hoping at least one would win. Unfortunately, no pun in 10 did.3. The past, the present, and the future walk into a bar. It was tense.4. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.5. It's hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally.6. What's the difference between ignorance and apathy? I don’t know and I don't care.7. Never discuss infinity with a mathematician; they can go on about it forever.8. A chemist walked into a couch store and ended up buying a photon.9. What's the problem with scientists? Periodically, they’re wrong.10. Why don't chemists like puns? All the best ones argon.Funny One-Linersolovedog/GettyImages11. Never trust an atom; they make up everything. 12. If you're considering working in a prison library, weigh both the prose and the cons.13. I wasn't originally going to get a brain transplant, but then I changed my mind.14. I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.15. I used to hate facial hair, but then it grew on me.16. I'm afraid of elevators, so I'm taking steps to avoid them.17. I don't trust stairs because they’re always up to something.18. I used to know how to throw a boomerang, but it’s not coming back to me now.19. I was wondering why the ball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.20. I wanted to buy camouflage pants, but I couldn't find any.Funny Food Punsbloodstone/GettyImages21. What do you get when you mix alcohol and literature? Tequila mockingbird.22. My sister bet that I couldn't build a car out of spaghetti. You should've seen her face when I drove pasta.23. Becoming a vegetarian is one big missed steak.24. Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded in France? There was nothing left but de Brie.25. What did the grape say when it got crushed? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.26. Did you hear about the unfaithful espresso? It was grounds for divorce.27. How does Moses make coffee? Hebrews it.28. Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? The food was good, but it had no atmosphere.29. What did one ear of corn say to the other? "You're a-maize-ing."30. I got rid of my vacuum cleaner. It was just gathering dust.Funny Animal PunsNickyLloyd/GettyImages31. Where can you find a whale that plays the flute? In an orca-stra.32. Dogs can't operate an MRI machine, but catscan.33. What did the ancient Roman say after a lion ate his wife? "Gladiator."34. What’s the body temperature of a Tauntaun? Lukewarm.35. My grandpa has the heart of a lion—and a lifetime ban from the zoo.36. How do pigs do their homework? With a pigpen.37. Two kittens had an argument. It was a cat-astrophe.38. What do you call an indecisive bee? A maybe.39. What do cows do on date night? Go to the moo-vies.40. What did the duck tell the waiter? "Put it on my bill."Best Puns of All TimeBloomberg/GettyImages41. The Middle Ages were called the Dark Ages because there were too many knights.42. What do you use to cut a Roman emperor's hair? Caesars.43. People from the UK call an elevator a "lift." I guess they were just raised differently.44. Why did Adele cross the road? To say hello from the other side.45. What kind of concert only costs 45 cents? A 50 Cent concert featuring Nickelback.46. What do you call a rude criminal going down the stairs? A condescending con descending.47. I can't believe I got fired from the calendar factory. All I did was take a day off.48. The machine at the coin factory suddenly stopped working with no explanation. It doesn't make any cents.49. Somebody stole all my lamps. I couldn't be more de-lighted.50. Where can you go to find a tiny Coke? Mini-soda.Read More: